Every year it is my goal to see all 5 of my nieces and nephews in their fall activities and sports. They live 3 1/2 hours from us. That's five different schedules (2 soccer, 1 cheer, 1 cross country, and 1 marching band) to try and coordinate the least amount of travel for us. I saw my niece's cross country meet (only 2 hours away) while Kevin was still in the hospital. I strategically planned a weekend visit home to see 2 soccer games and 1 cheer game with an added bonus of my niece and nephew going to homecoming dance and Jon and Kevin were able to fit in a comic expo with the boys and an extra extra bonus the Steelers were playing on TV and my nieces made me a birthday cake. My plan got foiled when the cheer game was canceled that weekend. So my brilliant plan of one weekend ended up being two weekends in a row. I decided to go back the following weekend by myself to see my niece's cheer game and I was able to add my nephew's marching band competition (which I wasn't planning on seeing until next month). I love seeing the kids find their niche and being able to see them experience it.
I have to share this story. I had been undecided about returning that second weekend for cheer and band. A few days before I began talking it through on the phone with my sister and later with a friend. Trying to weigh my options because it meant being away three weekends in a row with Kevin's birthday trip to Niagara Falls the following weekend. After I made the decision to go I then had to decide whether or not to take Kevin with me...again more talking it through. Kevin was just there with the family and would be seeing my parents the weekend after for his birthday. Jon had tentative plans to take Kevin to a wrestling show and to visit Grandma. I decided to keep it simple and give myself a respite and go by myself for one night. I packed my overnight bag and put it in the car so Kevin wouldn't see the "going on a trip" signs. Before leaving that morning, Jon and Kevin and I had breakfast out together at one of our favorite places. Kevin began crying at the table. It broke my heart. I instantly knew he knew I was leaving without him. I never talked to him about it but I definitely talked about it around him. I was stunned and felt guilty that I was going to see family without him. I began quickly calculating how long it would take me to run home pack up Kevin's supplies and take him with me and still make it in time for the cheer game. But Jon told me no...Kevin would be fine...and they had a good weekend together. Here's the thing...The first thing most special need parents will tell a kid or someone not used to interacting with a person who is non-verbal or unable to express himself is to talk to them as if they understand and are aware of everything you say and do. I know Kevin understands, is aware, and takes it in...but sometimes it doesn't connect for him...so it's difficult to determine how much he takes in when he doesn't always express himself...and apparently I forget when I'm not focused on him. I am so grateful for Kevin's Talker and pray that he is able to use it to express himself more and more...so that I don't make the mistake of underestimating him again. I am also thankful for the moments happy or sad that Kevin is able to express and make it known to me.
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| Comic Expo in Cincinnati |
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Homecoming Dance
I threatened to show up at the dance if my
nephew and niece didn't get a photo together. |
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| Ryan and his date |
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| Watching the marching band competition |
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Kevin and Dad at the WCW "World Championship Wrestling"
Apparently, Kevin loved it...oh boy! |
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